BLOG » if you’re fat you shouldn’t read this, but maybe you should:

once upon a time, Elizabeth Hurley was condemned for saying (in an interview)something along the lines of “if I was as fat as Marilyn Monroe, I would have killed myself too.” Now, that WASN’T the BEST way to represent herself in a quote. i even though she was a jerk for that, but still watched the Austen Powers movies cuz i love the sixties, and they’re too good! personally, I think Marilyn Monroe is/was gorgeous and the standards in HER day were different than they are today.although, I’m sure she was just as frantic about her weight as the girlies are today. 

but today, as i was trying to walk down the stairs to take the subway, I was fixated on the fat ass of a woman in front of me, blocking my path. Her and a dude were moving at maximum slowness, pushing their baby in a carriage. He had his arm around her (not tiny) waist and she leaned into him as though she felt sexy and maybe even, dare i say, comfortable in her skin!

I put myself in her situation, remembered the Hurley quote and thought- ‘you know what? I probably WOULD contemplate suicide if I was as big as THAT woman!(she was DOUBLE the size of Marilyn, fyi- which makes me way less cruel than liz hurley) And I’m sure as hell i wouldn’t have been able to feel sexy- alone OR in front of a dude who loved me. I wouldn’t even be able to FAKE being comfortable in my skin. I wouldn’t be able to trust his love for me!’ how sick is that? but it’s true. oh my god, years later and now i’m taking liz hurley’s side? or at least, giving her point of view a chance. 

Would I get the lap band? Probably. but would I ever even LET myself get to that level of fatness? Probably not. Now, I KNOW fatness CAN be hereditary, but no one in my family is fat. so the blame would be all my own. there’s no pointing fingers if I get to be the mayor of fatsville usa. I’m not ‘on the verge of death’ waify or anything-MAN, I WISH!- but if i got to THAT point of fatdom with the family genes that I have- it would be all my fault! 

I would either have to kill myself, get lypo, the lap band, go to jenny craig/weight watchers, and get a mother fucking trainer/nutrition guru. I ALREADY don’t eat bread, rice, pasta, donuts, soda, cake or candy. Every once in a while I’ll have a vegan dessert or a blow pop at a rave. 

so, when I see a fatty at cbtl getting a mocha frap with extra whip (and one for their overweight kid too) I think: you unhealthy monster(s)! you’re doing this to yourself. xo

95 Responses to “if you’re fat you shouldn’t read this, but maybe you should:”

  1. What do you eat?

  2. How is it possible to be a vegan and not eat carbs?

  3. i’m not vegan. i just like vegan food too.

  4. haha love true

  5. You know it’s not their fault. They physically cannot say no to that 17th piece of cake.

  6. What do you eat for breakfast?

  7. I had a similar experience yesterday. I was walking down 8th Ave (the one in Manhattan) and I noticed that the woman in front of me was so massive that her pants had split a bit in the back and she didn’t walk (she wobbled). I felt terrible for being disgusted by how massive she was. I mean, I could not bear to be that big but I still felt like a terrible person which is strange because society wants us to believe that there is a standard of beauty but when we point it out we’re scolded for thinking that way. Is anyone else confused?

  8. I don’t feel terrible for being disgusted at obesity. I find addiction disgusting in general. Anybody who lets a substance rule their life, makes me sick. I think thats a good thing. It keeps me from doing the same shit.

    And when I say substance, I mean food, drugs, money, opinions of others and religion. And probably bratty children. And animals. And jealous/controlling boyfriends.

  9. the hottest “fat” chic i ever seen…

  10. Yeah, Marinda. Any substance – food, drugs, animals, intolerance, etc. All bad. Except chocolate. (Note – white chocolate is not chocolate, it is technically an abomination).

    Boycrazy, you are only half as cruel as Hurley. However, I kinda like cruelty in tasty doses, so I can’t knock her for that.

    And Monroe was pretty big – maybe a size 10 or 12 in today’s numbers? It doesn’t make her a bad person, though. Oh wait – just checked my size chart and she’s right over the line of being a bad person. Never mind.

  11. You know what, it sucks seeing overweight people and having that reaction. It’s like, who gives a fuck, we’d probably be a lot happier being carefree. But you think about what it`s like and if that were to ever happen to you. I’m skinny, and I fucking feel this pressure to be even skinnier, and it sucks. I`m extremely thankful for my metabolism but I also have this fear that I`ll wake up one day, stand up, and my thighs will be touching, you know? I definitely don`t discriminate against anyone “bigger” than me and I wish others wouldn’t either because then maybe someone as skinny as myself wouldn`t have to feel like they ought to be skinnier. I mean, it’s a little fucked up that I feel this way when I guess I’m perfectly fine.

  12. its SAD why dont all Ugly girls kill themselves too
    there burdens on society just like fat people??

  13. good idea!

  14. You guys are mental. What does boycrazy eat? Please reveal. Thank you.

  15. love your site.

  16. be and let be

  17. A blow pop at a rave????

  18. it was a joke. but if i DO have a blow pop (NOT at a rave) it’s apple flavored!

  19. How much of this is farce? I think that these are ugly, negative thoughts that you shouldn’t even write to yourself, let alone an audience. You can’t comprehend a girl’s happiness because she isn’t thin? Why question it at all or even compare her to yourself? If I were in an industry reliant heavily on looks then I would be terrified to be ugly too, I guess. Desperate validation of beauty isn’t interesting or endearing.

  20. cool. thanks for taking the time to read and comment. however, i would never tell you or anyone what to think, read, or write- privately or for an audience. and i wasn’t exactly saying the fat lady who inspired me to write this post SHOULDN’T like herself or have self worth. instead, she made me look at myself and wonder how i would feel about myself if i was fat, like her. i wouldn’t have been able to be as strong as she is. and since i wouldn’t be able to be that strong…well then i better not get fat. this blog is not a farce. xo

  21. i just wonder why the most skinny girls i know aren’t as happy as the no that skinny ¿?

  22. You lost me on this post…………… really lost me:( I thought you were……….

  23. My friends and I all agreed not to read this blog after reading this, we feel really let down, like if you met us you probably wouldn’t want us as your readers because we wouldn’t live up to your standards

  24. Dissapointed in your recent crappy blog;;;;;

  25. well, that’s a shame. i would have hoped you wouldn’t chastise me for being honest about what i was thinking one day. people think a lot of horrible and cruel things all the time, and never say them out loud or give people the opportunity to judge them. you probably like this blog because i’m so blunt and honest. personally i wouldn’t get so offended by a blog called i’m boy crazy, but that is your choice. when i don’t like something, i ignore it and wish it well. things can’t affect you if you don’t let them. i guess i hit a nerve, which tells me more about you then it does me. but, just so you know, if we met in person…i would love you just as you are. honestly and sincerely. xoxoxo

  26. Alexi, I salute you.

  27. Hang on a sec,
    Boycrazy you are basically saying that fat people should not be happy. They should not even live.

    Just because they disturb your view on your way to the subway… How very dare they!?

    I could understand if you wouldn’t employ them or be friends with them, but denying their right to happiness or even worse- their right to live- is outrageous. This is beyond shallow: just stupid.

    This post was the first I read on your blog- be sure I am not to come back.

  28. when exactly did i deny their right to live? i must be black out blogging. and when did i say they shouldn’t be comfortable in their skin (actually, that’s not fair, i can see how i totally implied that)? but, and this is the last time i’m gonna spell out what i wrote for you: the post was about seeing a large woman comfortable in her skin and me realizing that i would not be able to be that way. all this stemming from a walk to the subway and remembering a harsh liz hurley quote. xo

  29. You’re still my crush.. haha

  30. i just keep thinking of Jane Birkin in BlowUp whenever i read IMBOYCRAZY.. almost totally naked “But you haven’t taken any photos”…

  31. alexi, i appreciate your honesty!

    yes, you guys, it's hard to take at times…but honesty & bluntness isn't meant to be kind & stroke your squishy thigh. i've struggled with my weight all my life & it totally sucks! i'm at a "normal" weight now, but every day i beat myself up for not working out to get to where i want to be & sometimes feel like i'm one mini-corndog away from blowing up like fat anna nicole…why am i eating those anyway?! sigh. anyway, i forgot where i was going with this…but cruel can be funny! it usually is! AND! this isn't a personal attack on anyone, really! alexi simply made an observation & visualized herself in that situation…and it horrified her. jesus!


  32. This post is extremely disturbing for many reasons.

    Firstly, your fixation “on the fat ass of a woman in front of me” is not one of respect. The terms and phrases that you use to describe this woman do not show that you have any openness towards individuals that are other than you (and the projected you, the you you wish to be that can be found through specific diets, make-up, yoga, and other controlled societal practices that mold a woman into the ideal subject of the male gaze). You describe this woman as in a state of “maximum slowness” (as if she is incapable of being within this world at a ‘normal’ rate or level). You describe her through out the post only in relation to weight, in your terms: at “THAT level of fatness” and at “THAT point of fatdom” (as if a woman at THAT level is undeserving of any other description). And finally, you define her as part of a group, a group of overweight individuals who are stereotypically pushed into one corner and labeled “unhealthy monster(s)”. All of your degrading descriptions of this woman override your suggestion that she may even feel sexy (“as though she felt sexy and maybe even, dare I say, comfortable in her skin!”).

    Secondly, you replace this woman (the emotions of her movement, her ability to love and be loved, her role as a mother, her right to walk as and where she wishes, etc.) with the size of her ass. You write so passionately about this ass that was “blocking [your] path” that you introduce her only as a body. And not even a body, but one part of a body! To refer to women only by their exterior further suppresses women under cultural norms that silence them within the patriarchal system.

    Thirdly, what you, as an author, intended to say (as revealed by your responses to reader commentary) was not communicated at all. In fact, the post communicated the opposite of what you desired. If you are a writer who believes not only in expression but power through language, then it should be your goal to write clearly. If you are unable to write successfully with intention then you risk empowering the wrong person. In this case, as in many other instances in your blog, you attempt to empower women through honest and expressive dialogue, yet you remain controlled by images of what a woman should look like and how a woman should act. Who are you really empowering here?

    You write inconsiderately towards others, but also towards yourself. I am sorry you were unable to see how this post disturbed readers.

    Suggested summer reading: Virginia Woolf A Room of One’s Own, Julia Kristeva Woman Can Never Be Defined, Helene Cixous The Laugh of the Medusa, and Luce Irigaray This Sex Which is Not One.

  33. Suggested spring reading: Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk. Story of My Life by Jay McInerney. Oh, The Places You’ll Go by Theodore Geisel.

    “If you are unable to write successfully with intention”, then you should write overly serious deconstructions of blog entries. What I got from the entry – Alexi has body image issues (this just in – girl in Hollywood with body image issues – film at eleven) – and seeing other extremes makes her think about her own issues in more stark contrasts. Then I got hungry and stopped paying attention because delivery food was here. Maybe I missed the deep meaning.

    Seriously, it would be fun to deconstruct your deconstruction (didn’t Virginia Woolf fill her pockets with stones and drown herself? are you suggesting her because of her illuminating work or her depressing life?)

    However, I don’t want to throw fuel on the fire. (Okay, maybe just a bit of fuel, but only ’cause I like watching things burn).

    Anything that encourages and engenders discourse is good. I like hearing your opinion and what you take offence at, and I like hearing her opinion. Someone who writes about body image is not inherently evil (she’s inherently evil for unrelated reasons). Did she use provocative language? Sure. Wow, an angsty writer in 2009 who uses provocative language in a blog about (let’s face it) sex.

    I think she should stop discussing body image issues as soon as Kathy Bates gets the same roles as Keira Knightley and fashion magazines don’t care if you’re 5’11 and 111lbs or 5’1 and 151 lbs. Oooh, and when tasty triple berry cakes grow on trees (just wanna get that in there in case anyone is granting wishes).

  34. I have to give you props for voicing your opinion without fear. The lack of fear on the topic has made for a comfortably obese America. Given, there are a few cases where people can’t change their circumstance, but if you can, shame on you for not trying. Given, also, there are some people with eating disorders. I don’t consider myself fat, but I know it’s my responsibility to take care of my body, and keep it healthy. We should all care.

  35. wow, this fat thing really hits a nerve huh?!

  36. My little sister kept going on at me about this opinionated blog and this crazy positive girl that went off on fascinating random tangents, but I literally found her in tears after reading this. Who knew someone could be so malicious?

  37. BTW Monroe was size 10 in her time which is around size 4/6 in our time.

    Your blog like any other personal blog is pure self-indulgent, so it’s natural that you write about your fear and distaste. Lame as fuck but what more I say?

  38. bebe- that’s awful! :( i kinda get what you mean though this site is usually full of really positive energy. like she’s living her life the way she wants and doesn’t care what people think of her behavior, but then she’s such a harsh judge of someone else’s behavior…

  39. so when when we look at drug addicts and alcoholics and think ew i never want to be like that, that’s ok to do? but when one girl points out seeing an overweight woman and thinking similiar thoughts, she’s suddenly this insensitive person. you people are wack. like we haven’t all made a fat joke once in our life. get over yourselves.

  40. you’d kill yourself if you were fat? you fucking sissy. shit gets worse than fat. and i don’t think this was you just voicing your opinion on some random topic, i think you were just trying to be catty or you were really fucking hard up for something to say.

  41. Haha yeah that’s a good point, if the thought of being fat makes you suicidal you’ve lived a very sheltered life. I’m kinda jealous that she’s that superficial actually, I WISH that being fat was the worst thign I could possibly imagine happening to me, ignorance really is bliss y’know.

  42. shit comes back and slaps you in the face. i bet you get fat. i bet you won’t kill yourself, either. idiot.


  44. oh my god people, don’t read this fucking blog if it insults you. nobody is forcing it down your throat! go eat cake



  45. Stupidity IS insulting. Ignorance IS insulting.

  46. imboycrazy is the most entertaining/hilarious/awesome blog ever! it’s like you’re constantly writing about the things I wish I’d said out loud.

    doin it.

  47. i randomly stumbled across your blog, and i couldn’t believe what i was reading. i’m all for being honest, but being honest and being a shallow bitch are two different things, and you are a shallow bitch. it’s ok to say that you yourself don’t want to be obese, and yes, it probably is their fault, but to speak about another human being in such a disrespectful manner is appalling. and on top of all of that, you’re a horrible writer. this post screams, “i have no class.”

  48. A HORRIBLE writer, I second that.

  49. Alexi!!! If I see you answer another one of these fucktards who are bashing your blog I will slap the taste out of your mouth next time I see you. To all the fucktards writing your stupid insecure hate responses to this blog: GO FUCK YOURSELVES. This is the goddamn internet not your fucking living room. You don’t like it, leave. If any of you fucking idiots knew this person would feel shity writing what you wrote. She’S one of the smartest, most considerate, caring people I know. She’s forward, fucking deal with it. Love you Lexi!

  50. How about my internet’s in my livingroom, Tarl?
    This post is full of shit, ALexi. I hope you honestly don’t walk around thinking such dumb lowclass shit all the time and then consider writing a damn blog entry about it.

  51. “i’m all for being honest, but being honest and being a shallow bitch are two different things”

    I just can’t resist good writin’. How are those – two different things?? What if she is a shallow bitch? Then she’s just being honest, right? That’s something to respect, by your logic. No offense to boycrazy. Although I have to say, any time someone prefaces a statement with “no offense”, you can expect to take offense. Many literary devices are just a way to dress up a pig.

    And no offense, but writing on someone’s personal blog comments that, “on top of all of that, you’re a horrible writer. this post screams, ‘i have no class.’” Might I respectfully question the class of the aforementioned comment? I’m not totally sure the only appropriate response to vague existential attacks on life – is to personalize those attacks.

    You also point out it probably is their fault if they’re fat, yet boycrazy is more calling herself out and even mentions that others sometimes have hereditary reasons. Yet as someone more prone to coltish beauty, she would have no one else to blame but herself if she suddenly were to become a lifetime member of Stuckey’s Pie Club.

    Luckily, judging by the 50+ comments on this topic, we can see that most people are not disturbed by ruminating on body image issues in modern society. So we can all go back to watching The Biggest Loser, or maybe Extreme Home Makeover.

    Too bad Queen for a Day was so far ahead of its time.

  52. nooo in college i learned how to binge eat (and binge drink)! help! i’m not fat or pudgy or any of that shit but…soon! what do you eat? any tips???

  53. haha I use to actually make signs saying you’ll be come fat if you eat here; back when I use to work at McDonald’s and Burger King. Lucky me my manage actually let me show my art off to customers. Which the art consisted of a fat person with the letters “This will become you, if you eat here”

  54. Mmmhm cake :) ))
    great blog.
    speak your mind.
    if they dont like it,
    they can suck it.

  55. I think its cool of you to be honest about this in such a public forum, and I’ve had these exact same thoughts too. I wouldn’t call myself skinny, but when I see someone really obese, I just wonder how they live their lives on a day to day basis, when I sometimes feel like I can’t even get dressed and go to work because I feel so down on myself and fat. But you should also keep in mind (as should I, as should everyone) that this woman probably just had a baby (you said she was pushing on in a baby cart thing) and maybe she’s normally skinny but the cursed baby made her all fatness. And good for her if she still feels good about herself. Honestly, some people just don’t have the money to eat vegan foods and healthily and go to a gym and work out everyday. They just don’t. And if they can still feel good about themselves, even if they don’t have a perfect body, I think that’s good for them! And if I read what you said right, I kind of think that’s what you’re saying too. That you wouldn’t be able to do that. Neither would I.

  56. I can’t decide if I really like you or find you incredibly annoying. Maybe it’s both? I hate this feeling, but it is a consequence of me trying to be a better person and not judging too quickly/running to conclusions (not for anyone else’s sake though, just mine.)

  57. I think this is natural response to over weight people. I mean society has taught us for years that being over a certain size is not okay. I think everyone has a little bit of judgment inside of them. I am what is considered by society- a bit chubby myself and I feel the same way as you do. Weight is an epic battle, some people can control it and some just choose not too. I don’t think people should feel guilty about giving their honest opinions.

  58. you should really see a therapist (or if you’re already seeing one: show her this post). I’m not trying to be rude or condescending. Seriously, you have a lot of really scary issues that you should probably deal with.

  59. mmm
    You look like your fifty
    And you don’t even smoke?
    Shit i’d kill myself if i looked like you
    I understand the way you look is hereditary
    But i would buy some bronzer, and get a better hair cut ASAP- it doesn’t suit your body.
    maybe a nose job..Cheek implants..i dunno you need a lot of work
    I’d never post videos of myself looking like YOU
    Think about what you write about.

  60. If she has a kid and a man I think she is doing a few things right, just food for thought

  61. Hmm, you are a bit like the Carrie Prejean of Blogging.
    Just stating your honest opinion and all.
    Because homosexuality is a choice you know?
    Just like obesity is always a choice.

    Post more videos of your hot ass.
    And yes i’ve been wearing standard APCs for ages.


  62. Jesus christ, when did all these self-righteous fucks flood your blog? Most of you politically correct, holier than thou pussies are just putting words in Alexi’s mouth. I honestly do not think she gave obese individuals a negative connotation, just wondered how they deal with everyday life being the polar opposites of society’s beauty standards. The same way i wonder how AIDS victims, shunned from society because of their condition and doomed to short and unfulfilling lives deal with theirs. Simple curiosity, no judgement. Keep on keeping on Alexi, love from the capitol of texas.

  63. Overweight people can have thyroid problems and maybe you wouldn’t want to kill yourself just because of a thyroid issue. Oh wait I forgot you have thyroid issues too.

    Skinny isn’t always healthy.

    People who are not skinny are not necessarily fat.

    Get a better therapist and some sensitivity training. Oh wait I’m sorry that must not matter as much as getting press and becoming the next Horey Kennedy.

  64. well I saw a black woman and I thought, how can she live with herself!! if I wasn’t white I would totally kill myself!!! and I saw this dyke and I thought how could she live with herself!! I would kill myself if I wasn’t straight!! everyone who isn’t straight & white & thin is SO disgusting and should all just die. BUT they are SO strong for not killing themselves when they look in the mirror – how BRAVE!

    oh I’m just being honest and really open and everything.

  65. Geez why are all these people bagging on you!

  66. Didn’t Hugh Grant cheat on Elizabeth Hurley with a hooker twice Marilyn Monroe’s size?

    So satisfying.

  67. I can’t help but notice that she responds to people who criticize her, but not to people who say all fat people should die. Hmm…

  68. Goddamn, this blog is awful. Like, scratch-my-eyes-out, cringingly bad. And this particular post is sizeist bullshit. “OMGZ fatties! EWW! amirite??? like WHATEVER, i’m just being HONEST!” Get a fucking clue.

    Can’t wait to not watch your new Showtime series!

  69. It’s at least comforting to know that your show will be short lived, unwatched and soon forgotten.

  70. Well you look like anna wintours ugly twin and that offends me. Looking forward to your show not making it past pilot.

  71. I really liked your content but perhaps this time you may have been too sick while writing because the article it seems rushed.

  72. anyone who is complaining and dissing alexi is fat. boo! that’s a post my dear. that’s a post!

  73. anyone who is complaining and dissing alexi is fat. boo! that’s a post my dear. that’s a post!

  74. As someone who has recovered from anorexia and is know “fat” due to completely fucking up my eating habits, body and metabolism, this pretty much made me feel like complete shit. Commentary like this is what fuels eating disordered individuals. Thanks for the pick me up.

  75. Being big doesn’t always mean they don’t eat right, it’s also genetic. Some women can’t help having a slow metabolism even when they try to speed it up with healthy eating.

  76. I bet lots of men were masturbating to monores ass.

  77. I think you’re a anorexic bitch that needs to get a life rather than being a little pussy by making fun of people.

  78. Fuck lazy fat pieces of shit. You go girl, tell her it!

  79. Well, skinny girls, and I mean really skinny girls who are in TOTAL perfect unbelievable, like I mean anorexic control of your bodies, good news! YOU like me and so many of my friends are probably going to have the life changing experience of being fatties yourselves in 10 or 15 years! If you survive, because no matter how bad you profess to “YOU”D RATHER DIE” anorexia almost killed me, sisters, and many of my friends were hospitalized with it, all of us fought for life. I lost a lot of kidney function though, and was barely able to have a child because of that. She’s a beautiful kid though, a naturally slim (like I was, once) teenager now… but because i had to be skinnier and skinnier I starved myself . Now my metabolism is really f’d up . I still barely eat but to be “FAT” like Marylyn, what a joke. I’d love to be like Marylyn. You little tiny idiots. I used to look like a survivor from a nazi prison camp, i looked terrible and i was sooo proud of it. Like you are. Its a disease. Now so many years later, I am fighting to get my metabolism back because I slowed it down so much, and no, it has nothing to do with gluttony or addiction, I eat to survive now and thats all, and i guarantee I’m bigger than the woman you were walking behind, and you will be too. btw, do you have the facial hair that anorexic women get yet? thats something to look forward too! really attractive. hahaha

  80. You’re all c*nts and rude assholes.

  81. I never comment on blogs… but this I just can’t resist. First, don’t write a blog and post it for the public to see and not expect people to say something negative about it. Second, what she has said is not something people think from time to time.

    I am a fat girl. Always have been, always will be. It is a constant struggle. I am addicted to sodas. I haven’t drank one in 4 years. My top weight was 240 lbs (size 22/24). My smallest adult weight (1 1/2 yrs ago) has been 165 (size 10). Right now I am at 190 due to gaining weight from stress and blood pressure medications. But its all good, because it went up to 205 and this is me getting back down. When I was “thinner” bigger girls would say things like, “you don’t know, your not fat”. I always responded with, “But I AM a fat girl”. They were shocked.

    Do we want to be fat? No. Nobody wants to be fat and if they say they do then they are a damned liar. Would I “die” if I were “that fat”? No, but I would most likely want to. Does the girl in the subway, dare she look comfortable in her skin, actually feel that way? Probably not when she looks at herself. Her secret to that spark that you saw that seems to have disgusted or angered you was the man standing next to her. That woman has a freakin’ pot of gold she is carrying around with her. So long as she looks in his eyes, she probably does feel wonderful and sexy. When she looks in the mirror she probably doesn’t understand why he looks at her that way. Hats off to her and the luck she has found. I had an ex-husband who told me that the gym wasn’t doing me any good and that I would never lose weight.

    Losing weight is HARD HARD work. It is filled with a lot of pain, sweat and tears. You cuss yourself, the scale, food and life. Gaining the weight creeps up on you and can happen so quickly it is almost as though it happened when you took an afternoon nap with your toddler.

  82. Oops, I meant- Not what people don’t think about from time to time.

    My bad

  83. I am a big girl (& I mean big … I have crazy “man” muscles + a layer of blubber), always have been. My weight is the result of a combination of raging hormones & bad eating habits. I do not consume vast amounts of food, but I definitely eat the wrong types of food & have a terrible weakness for full cream dairy products. My biggest failing is probably that I cannot stand “working out”, I become irritable just thinking about being hot, sweaty, red faced & winded on the treadmill while my painfully skinny husband (not his fault, he can’t gain weight … but he’s still a jackass) stuffs his face with all sorts of junk & plays XBox until he passes out. Funny then that I am quite sporty & active, I love a good strenuous hike & you would never be able to keep up with me on a paintball field. I am funny, intelligent & easy to get on with … 90% of the people that I meet are immediately attracted to me (not sexually) & I easily command the attention of any crowd I am in (my husband says that I have that particular tone of voice that is impossible to ignore). However, I can honestly tell you that I have never been comfortable in my own skin. I would trade all the character traits I just mentioned to be thin. You never get used to being fat / obese as it causes much physical discomfort on top of the mental issues you WILL develop. When I met my husband in my late teens (same size tjat I am now at 31 … my weight doesn’t move in either direction) he was just blown away by the person that I am. He still enjoys showing me off in public (because of my intellevt & personality) & loves it when I start talking about my job (I am a high voltage electrical engineer) or my passion (I am a total petrol-head & gadget nut). Lately he has become exceedingly cruel about my body … he says that my weight grosses him out & he is creeped out by the symptoms of my hormone imbalance. But of course he says he still loves me … just not like that. I caught him making plans to meet up with other women (for no strings attached) & his response was that I forced him into it by being fat & I should be grateful that he hasn’t filed for divorce. Ever since then I feel disgusted & ashamed of my body

  84. Ok … so I have had body issues most of my life & now my husband has just reinforced my self loathing. I have always been bashful about my looks (the loud personality draws attention away from my body) & never try to play the “sexy” card. I always try to dress well for my size but I don’t even bother with makeup. The thing that has always baffled me is that there is never a shortage of men that fall all over themselves to flirt with me (maybe it’s because I am usually the only engineer in a dress & pumps) & I guess it should make me feel better but it really doesn’t … these guys are probably caught up in the desire to dominate me & aren’t interested in anything “real”. I love my husband deeply & chose to marry him because I thought he was above being icked out by my fat rolls, excessive body hair & the particular skin condition that excess testosterone causes (he suffers from the same condition … he used steroids as a teen in an effort to gain weight). Finding out that he thinks I am gross after 13 years together has just taken the wind right out of my sails & more than ever, I hate my body. Someone suggested that obese people should be shot … normally I would be outraged, but I think being shot would be a kindness for me. Tired of paying the bills, doing the housework, cooking, washing & basically trying to be the best “me” I can be, only to be deemed worthless by the person that I care for more than anything in this world because I “don’t look like a hot, tight 18 year old porn star”. Yes being obese is very uncomfortable & well done to you for considering how it must feel. I think most of us in the 30+ BMI range have considered suicide … more than once & a good number of people have tried.

  85. Just to give you an idea of the kind of fat that I am … if it wasn’t for my ample bosom & wide, rounded hips you might easily mistake me for a tubby man. I have a rugby players shoulders, I can’t wear long boots because of my bulging calf muscles & my husband frequently tells me that my biceps are freakishly well developed (he says that most men would kill to develop biceps like mine). Not cool … not only am I fat, I am also a bit masculine. Try that on for uncomfortable.

  86. This isn’t what you would call a coherent argument. Is the ‘pep talk in the form of a slap in the face in the form of a blog’ just an excuse for extremely poor (and somewhat bigoted) rhetoric?

  87. Yeah, because every blog is supposed to be a masterpiece in rhetoric.

  88. I wasn’t asking your opinion.

  89. Then why post your comments on a forum which – quite clearly – is primarily concerned with opinions?

  90. Is this conversation going anywhere?

  91. No. Neither is the blog’s original conversation.

  92. No. Neither is the blog’s original conversation…!

  93. I feel like taking my life. I’m a fat ass bitch. I am trying my damnedest to lose weight and it never comes off. So, I diet. Get a gym membership. Go twice a day somedays. And still I’m fat. You guys are right. I should just fucking end my life. Nobody gives two shits about a fat ass bitch. I wish I could be skinny. I try but nothing is working. I’m giving up…

  94. Wow you are not fat and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise everybody is beautiful in there own way and no matter how skinny you get you will still call your self fat

  95. Marinda you are a ugly ass person inside and out no matter how skinny you are you will still be a ugly ass bully just by you saying ow if I was fat I would kill myself firstly are you stupid second skinny or not everybody is beautiful because god made then you are the meanest,cruelest person I have ever met and you should really consider praying for gods forgiveness

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