BLOG » the blind leading the blind (part 36):
1. REMEMBER CARROTS? think of them as ‘mother nature’s potato chips’! enjoy!
2. no. that outfit does NOT look good on you!
3. when the barista gives you a full fat latte, when you clearly asked for a non fat latte, the bitch is trying to fuck with you/ruin your life. trust me. there are no mistakes!
4. my therapist says that when i wake up and look in the mirror, I’m only allowed to say hello to myself! i can’t think anything mean, belittling, or harsh about myself. yeah, good-luck,me! but, personally, i blame the mirror for all the negativity.
5. stop distracting yourself, and do your fucking work! whether it’s homework, a writing deadline, or whatever! get it done! no one else can do it for you! that means STOP reading blogs (mine excluded), fb, twitter, myspace (is myspace still alive even? well if it IS, cut it the fuck out too!) it’s called a MEDIA FREEZE people! and sometimes, a lot of the time, it has to be put in effect god dammit!
6. don’t get back with an ex. it NEVER WORKS! sure, there are a few exceptions. but the majority of the time, it will end all over again! why put someone through that twice? why put yourself through that twice? all the things that drove you two apart to begin with, are still there! lurking beneath the surface. maybe even some new annoying things too! do what you will, but… i warned you!
7. always wear latex gloves when you go tagging!
8. stop eye darting when you’re talking to me, i mean, people… when you’re talking to people!
9. don’t forget to touch yourself! this includes: finger-banging yourself, jerking yourself off, stimulating your clitoris, or just patting yourself on the back! cuz why not?! you’ve earned it buddy!
10. never use the word ‘buddy’ in conversation. it confuses peoples insides.
dear alexi,
you’re a fabulous human being – love your blog! number 5 and 6 are gold..needed to hear that from someone right now! xo
elle
Oh my god. In crazy lust with your blog. Following like, now.
Stace x
I recently stumbled on your blog and I LOVE it and you have so much wisdom that its FREAKY!! You have a way of talking about things that I am going through which is creepy!!
Thank you for #5 because I need a little slap in the face to get away from procrastination!
AWESOME BLOG!
p.s. loved the hip hop dancing in the previous post!
took a homework break to read the new post, now i am somewhat ashamed of myself.. maybe i will go tweet about it
Ive been waiting for a new blog all day!
I woke up this morning and the first thing ive done is check this blog. . number 5 was my killer last night.
fuck. how’d you now?
#5, seriously, yes.
#6, getting back with your ex can be the most stimulating, and emotionally fulfilling, relationships you could have. rekindling the flame is so much sweeter than sparking a new one! this is only if it didn’t end on ‘motha-fucka-ya-momma’s-a-bitch’ terms, of course.
esb is incredibly cute and has a certainly readable blog! (; fresh influence
i’m going to go do my homework now…
thank you for #5. i have a 10 page paper due this afternoon and i’m only halfway done. eek.
hi alexi.. i know this is off topic but i actually need some advice. i am a pretty miserable person, i always have been. you have mentioned more than once to get rid of negativity in your life – people who bring you down. i love my friends very much and am at the point where i don’t think i need to “get rid” of any of them. HOWEVER, those who bring me down the most are my mother and my brother. they bring much extra not-needed negativity in my life, so i figured the best thing to do would be to move out. so i am now living on my own at 18, working full time and going to school full time, yet, all of that family negativity is still completely there. i know family is very important and just ignoring them would be immature but basically i have no fucking clue how to get rid of that negativity. they just think so little of me and it keeps me down even though i know my friends don’t think that low of me at all.
this rant is going no where. i don’t even really know what i’m asking you. what would you do about this, alexi?
p.s. blind leading blind’s are my favorite entries
Tagging is the new pilates.
i love these so much.
i really these and agree with some or most or all of these points you rant about.
for future blogging, can you please address the fact that so many of these completely attractive men are gay?!
xD
it’s killing me. i mean more power to them but shit man.
idk just saying
<33
eeeh i meant i really do love these**
xD
also i should have added the question if you have addressed that fact in past blogs? haha
<3
i probably should be working on this research paper due soon,
but the blind leading the blind posts are the best
thanks for #5, I always need it
i love love love blind leading the blind.
god i love your blog! soooo true.
11. Don’t wear green on St. Patrick’s day. That way you’re more likely to get pinched — hopefully on the nipple!
I knew there must be an explanation as to why my neighborhood coffee shop gives me my latte with skim milk only 5 out of the 10 times I ask for it. They should have it down by now ’cause I go there almost every day. ASSHOLES!
http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/
I agree about the buddy part. Whenever someones calles me buddy it makes me feel like a little kid, or that I am some dog
FINALLY SOMETHING GOOD IN YOUR BLOG AGAIN; it has been a while, this is real good advice with a smirk of irony.
Sooo, know that ex rule (which is fab, but I break it, in drunken desperation ALL THE friggin time
)
Well, is it wrong to make out with a bar find in front of your ex’s house…cuz he lives down the street from your fave bar, and you were trying to booty call(him), but you can (even sober) remember which house is his? and the guy you were flirting with at the bar(not him), figured out that you are an getaway artist…follows you, and then you make out with him(cuz you thought it was the ex ), as your ex comes home?
Just wondering? : )
The “Buddy” thing. I had an ex who called me “Buddy”/”Bud” a week or so after we broke up. I almost puked at work. Way to asexualize yourself, buddy. Using “buddy” was almost as lame as the sex. Almost.
haha. so true!
you’re a mind reader.
I need to STOP procrastinating!!!
lol k these keep getting better, seriously. love you Alexi
You are my hero !
What is tagging?!
I found the boy in the photo!!!! So cute..his Facebook page is here: http://www.facebook.com/kimmorley
did you find him through alexi?
ps. this post rocks alexi
alexi i love your blog. the blind leading the blind = the kick in the pants i need to actually be productive. thanks.
alexi….#6 is ohhh so true!! a guy i was recently seeing is considering getting back with his crazy ex….hahahah obbbvi cause you say it doesn’t work it wont…so ha ha ha ….sucks for him!
ps. you rock and i love you!
hahaaa latex gloves.. I concur.
I love you.
hi alexi i need some advice ,see i really like this boy at school i dont know if he likes me back most of my sisters friends think he likes me but i dont know can you help me!
ps. you rock your amazing
amazing how many of you fall for this fake crap.
your blog is cool and everything but most of your advice is really negative. you talk about ridding negativity but your promoting and perpetuating it. seems as if you want people to be just like you, but you seem unhappy, insecure, kinda slutty, with a total obsession with your weight. you’re a virus to young girls who cant think for themselves. think about it. your obvs a really smart girl and a talented writer, use it for good not petty evil bullshit.
im with chainsaw on this….
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