BLOG » under the skirt, over the panties:
Ever since my first kiss, under the hidden stairs of a temple at one of my classmates bar mitzvahs, with a mouth full of braces and a crazy tongue circling technique- i learned something. something that hasn’t changed from then to know:
Boys will ALWAYS see how far they can take can go; how far they can take it, when it comes to sexy times.
it’s as though ALL thoughts/fear/acknowledgement of getting AIDS, herpes, warts, chlamydia, whatevs, goes out the window when their dick is involved. if they kiss you, they wanna suck on your boobs. if they get that, they wanna put their hands in your undies. if they finger you, they want to lick you. if you give them get a blow job, they want to cum in your mouth/on your face/in your eyeball; and for you to swallow like a champ! and if they know you’re gonna sexxx them, they want to fuck you WITHOUT a condom. they NEVER want to wear a condom! ‘it’s too tight’, ‘it’s too big’, ‘i can’t feel anything’, ‘it’s so annoying’, ‘i hate these fucking things’, ‘i’m clean i swear.’ wahhhhh!
it’s like going into battle;
it’s like wheeling and dealing at some flea market in Abu Dhabi (reference made in honor of sex and the city 2: coming soon, to a theatre near you muthah-fuckahz/ladies/my gay brothers!)
it’s like playing Russian roulette with an aids baby instead of a bullet!
it’s like sitting down without a lawyer in court, with a possible life sentence of…. like death.
you just have to make your case, make it good, and stand by it! so you don’t get a life sentence! all the while keeping your voice sexy and the mood light.
Nowadays you have to protect yourself while trying to get close to someone. it fucking sucks! It’s easy to start resenting a guy right away when sex is involved. what you let happen sexually is something you end up panicking over/worrying about- the next day, or even moments after. instead of ‘wow. we just connected in such a literal, beautiful, biblical way! yayzers!’ you think ‘i hope the condom didn’t break. he better not have lied about not having herpes. shit, he probably just doesn’t even know cuz he’s too lazy to get tested. if he was such a pro about getting in MY vadge without a condom, he must have experience talking OTHERS into being fucked sans condom!”
instead of thinking ‘i wonder if he’ll call me.’ you’re waiting for his TEXT three days later while sitting in the waiting room at your gyno’s office praying to god you’re not preggers, positive for syphilis, warts, etc.
All this worry even if he DID wear a condom AND pulled out before he came! you just NEVER know! THAT’S how scary it is nowadays! Sex is a liability, not a luxury! and abortions aren’t another form of birth control! they’re scary too! avoid those at all costs, if you can.
But as scary as fucking, and licking, and sexing, and sucking is in 2010- love, sex, and hormones are STILL too powerful to say no to! now, then, and FOREVER! So i guess all we can do is just know what we’re getting ourselves into, not feel pressured or bullied, use condoms, birth control pills, spermicide, diaphragms, take preventative valtrex, get tested after every time we sexxx someone/blow someone/get eaten out by someone, and basically try our hardest not to end up soaked in a bucket load of aids infected cum.
i love you.