1. if it’s too soon to tell him where you live, it’s probably too soon to fuck him.
2. wax your fucking pussy, jerk off! It’s summer you skag! What are you trying to do, grow shrooms down there?! Jesus fucking christ!
3. men who aren’t ticklish, should not be trusted!
4. as a modern woman, you have to at least offer to pay. But if he let’s you pay on the first date, he’s a fucking loser.
5. don’t date a dude with a baby(ies), herpes, warts, a wife, who has been divorced, and/or is way short.
6. be a dude magnet and wear an old sportz shirt or metal shirt, preferably with side boob! Added bonus- know something about the team/band you’re representing!
7. if you’re having a conversation with a dude, and he gives you his card & says you should call him, but the longer you two speak, he says ‘you know what, you should just email me, it’s really the best way to reach me.’ you’ve been demoted, and the dude’s not down.
8. get rid of all clothing that’s trying its hardest to manipulate you/confuse you/make you look ugly/fat/ or will deter a dude from wanting to fuck you. oh whoops, RE-WRITE: you can always get some dude to fuck you. what i meant was: get rid of clothing that will deter a cute/hottt/top tier dude from wanting to fuck you and/or be your boyfriend. you’re welcome!
9. longer hair is better hair fucko.
10. even if you have a crush/your eye on a new guy- don’t let his absence ruin your night on the town with the girls. the world is big. always have your eyes open to see the whole picture!
By: boycrazy on July 23, 2010
Tags: the blind leading the blind
32 Comments »
