BLOG » the blind leading the blind (part 47):
1. the only mags you should keep on your coffee table are ones that have articles about you in them. And if there aren’t any, you’re not working hard enough.
2. hey girls! men are attracted to the scent of other men! So douse yourself in jizz ladies! I’m joking! geeze! But seriously. Do it.
3. when text flirting, don’t forget to set the other person up for a reply text. otherwise you’ve just texted yourself into a lonely, unsexy corner.
4. girls, don’t give a dude your address on the first date. Meet him there! And if you’re gonna drink, take a car service or a cab. It’s not that expensive and it feels fancy bad-ass! oh yeah, plus you won’t die in a car wreck maybe!
5. most of the time, the decisions we make are made out of not wanting someone to think we’re a dick OR an asshole.
6. people who don’t like pesto, avocados, tomatoes, or tv are strange and should not be trusted.
7. when you text someone ‘I had fun’ and the person never texts you back, it means they did NOT have fun.
8. just like you will ABSOLUTELY be eaten by a shark if you go in the ocean during your period- you will totally be mauled by a bear if you go on a hike during your period.
9. “i don’t mean this in a bad way…” is never an intro for anything GOOD. It just makes people think you’re a meddling asshole. so get a fucking life!
10. whilst wearing leggings, always wear a shirt that covers your privates. Nobody needs to catch a glimpse of your sweat stain, vadge stain, or camel toe. And fyi, people are immediately searching for this the moment they see a girl walk by in leggings. And PS: ONLY wear BLACK leggings asshole! Really? nude/tan leggings? Who the hell do you think you are? And what the fuck are you trying to prove dude? A little too much if you ask me! either that OR you’re just sleepwalking through life. PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU! even though they wish they couldn’t and don’t care about you and your boring life story.
i feel the same way about the leggings. no matter how much i rant, i seem to still find people wearing them as pants! for godsake, they are NOT!
Fantastic, miss.
#2LOVE IT!! ! !
#9….so true
#10 awesome!!
thank you for the leggings tip. too many people wearing leggings the WRONG way. LEGGINGS ARE NOT PANTS
#6=completely amazing.
people who dont like avocados are dangerous. really cant be trusted.
What does “meddaling” mean? Do you mean “meddling”?
see this is why blind leading the blind is my fav
“6. people who don’t like pesto, avocados, tomatoes, or tv are strange and should not be trusted.”
THERE
IS
SO
MUCH
TRUTH
TO
THIS
STATEMENT.
is that pic of kirsten dunst?? i LOVE HER SO HARD!!!!! shes my ULTIMATE fave!!!!!!!!!
the blind leading the blind is everyone’s fav
I also include people who don’t like mayo in number 6. Don’t know why, they just weird me out.
What about magazines that have articles you’ve written in them…are those coffee table-worthy? And I don’t like avocados, but I do love guac. With plenty of big, salty chips. Does that count?
Ellen, I’d say if you have a byline, flaunt it! You’ve earned it!
#8 is timely since Shark Week just wrapped up. As if we need any more reasons not to go in the ocean.
“PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU! even though they wish they couldn’t”
hahaha
[...] baaaack. The Blind Leading The Blind Part 47. (ImBoyCrazy) Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)Whut Up, [...]
Gotta say, I HATE HATE HATE when people wear leggings as pants. I call it an LAP violation. I should start handing out tickets and collecting fines.
Does the leggings rule apply to jeggings? They are made of a slightly thicker material, after all, and look kinda like real pants…
#9: YESS!!! And also when people start a sentence by saying, “No offense, but…” before they tell you something. Some douche told me, “No offense, but that dress is hideous.” No offense? I sure as fuck don’t want to be around when you actually *want* to be offensive! Jerk.