BLOG » reader submission: ‘playing hard to get’
I’m dying to know your opinion on playing hard to get with guys -
This email has come about as a result of a recently failed “relationship.”
Here’s the background – we met through mutual friends and had been dating for a few weeks – he would always be the one to call/text me to ask me out and generally made me feel like he was interested in me. I’ve always been a believer that if a guy really likes you he’ll make the effort to pursue you and that men HATE being pursued by women - because women who pursue are perceived as “desperate” and “needy.” Anyway, I decided that I liked him and threw my rule book out the window so to speak and initiated conversation/asked him out twice in one weekend. He politely turned me down both times and has since disappeared from my life (despite having taken the time a mere few days earlier to call and sweetly wish me happy birthday).
This situation, while trivial, really got me thinking about playing hard to get and whether it’s a bunch of bullshit or something women need to do to avoid the clingy/needy/desperate stereotype we are so often labeled with. Do you find that the majority of guys you date dislike women that are forward/ask them out/call them etc.? Or am I stuck dating the same type of neanderthal that thinks it’s 1955 over and over again? Why does being real and asking out a guy when I want to see him seem to freak them out?
Are guys more attracted to women who behave passively at the beginning of a relationship?
Sick of playing games <3
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