the blind leading the blind (part 110):

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1. being mean to your mom in public is totally NOT COOL. keep that shizz behind closed doors where it belongs.

2. always use a soft toothbrush. i mean, don’t you like yourself? Geeze!

3. only date people you look up to, who inspire you, who intimidate you, who make you nervous, who you want to be good for. it will make you BETTER!

4. when trail mix is good, it’s REALLY good. but when you get DUSTY trail mix. ugh! that shit is the worst!

5. will somebody please tell über car drivers to figure out how to fucking get to where I’m asking them to take me on their own gps without asking me how to get there every step of the way?! they’re not even good-looking enough to be THAT dumb!

6. if you ever start doubting there’s a god, stop where you are and remember: there’s a starbux RIGHT next to Larchmont beauty center. um, things like that don’t just happen.

7. there are many reasons why it’s not cool to have affairs with married men , but here’s one of my favorites: you can sex or make out with anyone, anytime. but what’s REALLY sexy is possibility and a future with someone. and not knowing but dreaming and finding out where a new romance could go/take you. but with a married guy… there is no possibility, because all you’re reduced to is a secret.

8. next time you see a guy picking his nose in his car, make eye contact with him and hold it. i want him to see you seeing him so he knows it’s not ok.

9. there’s nothing worse than getting a text from someone and not being able to follow-up right away and then getting a SECOND text from them that’s all passive aggressive saying something along the lines of  ‘well, i hope we’re still friends.’ RELAX everybody. haven’t you ever heard of having a life or DRIVING? we can’t be connected all the time, all day long. cut it out! double texting/passive aggressive texts will ensure NEVER getting a response back… even when the person is NO longer driving or busy. get it?

10. when visiting someones house, try your hardest NOT to use their bathroom. PLEASE! it only makes you appear weak and disgusting.

PS:

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER @imboycrazy

the blind leading the blind (part 109):

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1. ‘jealousy is just love and hate at the same time.’ – drake ‘over my dead body’

2. never break up with a guy who offers to mount your tv on your wall BEFORE he mounts your tv on your wall.

3. if school curricula were determined by the subjects’ contributions to future happiness, 50% would be allocated to relationships. -Alain de Botton / @alaindebotton

4. hey guys! guess what?! lilacs are back! girls love lilacs! give girls some lilacs!

5. if his favorite book is ‘the story of the eye’ throw out all the eggs in your fridge and break up with him immediately! you AREN’T that kind of gurl!

6. never let a relationship interfere with your career. if it interferes with your work, that means it’s the wrong relationship. OR that you are a career driven selfish monster who is incapable of love and opening your life up in a real way. but hey, YOU decide.

7. stream of consciousness style texting has got to stop. it’s too much and makes my phone beep to the point of wanting to kill myself and/or the person texting me.

8. no way! that’s so kewl! you met a guy while he was riding his bike?! awesome! but before you go out with him… make sure dude owns a CAR!

9. be in the world but not of  the world.

10. play truth or dare more. especially if your friends are a bunch of terrified, shy, pussies. it’s perfect for coaxing your friends out of their shell!

PS: follow me on twitter @imboycrazy

PPS: this is one of my favorite songs in the entire world…

alexi recommends:

MPW-54544

Tonight 9pm “Boycrazy Radio” w/ Avi Buffalo! Call in! xx

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Tonight/Wednesday April 24, 2013 9pm pst join me during ‘Boycrazy Radio’

 

Call in and ask a question, so together we can discuss and solve all your love, sex, dating, & overall life problems: 

(646) 378-0649

 

Click HERE to listen to LIVE show.

 

If you’re in another country, you can call in using gmail or Skype!

 

If you can’t call in during the live show, leave a message in the boycrazy voice-mailbox: (888)666-2045

 

Follow me on twitter @imboycrazy  

 

Subscribe to ‘Boycrazy Radio’ on iTunes

 

Listen to previous episodes of ‘Boycrazy Radio’ below:

Listen to internet radio with Alexi Wasser on Blog Talk Radio

Tonight 9pm “Boycrazy Radio” – Call in! xx

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Tonight/Wednesday April 17, 2013 9pm pst join me during ‘Boycrazy Radio’

 

Call in and ask a question, so together we can discuss and solve all your love, sex, dating, & overall life problems: 

(646) 378-0649

 

Click HERE to listen to LIVE show.

 

If you’re in another country, you can call in using gmail or Skype!

 

If you can’t call in during the live show, leave a message in the boycrazy voice-mailbox: (888)666-2045

 

Follow me on twitter @imboycrazy  

 

Subscribe to ‘Boycrazy Radio’ on iTunes

 

Listen to previous episodes of ‘Boycrazy Radio’ below:

Listen to internet radio with Alexi Wasser on Blog Talk Radio

the blind leading the blind (part 108):

 

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1. when a guy is about to go down on you and you pull out your tampon and fling it across the room in a moment of passion; the next day, make sure you check for residual blood splatterings on the wall and curtains. This will prevent you from scaring off the next guy who rolls through your bedroom… or what i like to refer to as ‘where the sloppy magic happens.’

2. one of the worst feelings is when you’re on a date with someone and both of you have been ignoring your phones (in a modern attempt at  romance) – until you come back from the ladies room and find your date covertly checking his phone: texting, emailing, tweeting,  what have you – and then fumble to put it away as quickly as possible when he notices you coming back.

3. i think it’s just as exciting to hear guttural weeping as it is to hear really loud sex. luckily for my neighbors, they get to experience both. indulge YOUR neighbors.

4. if the way you eat by yourself is drastically different from the style of eating you have when you’re in front of people, you really need to rethink the manner in which you’re running your life… because this means you’re disgusting.

5. i know you like sitting in your car and talking on the phone, texting, being cozy, getting your emails done, etc. but try to pull over to a spot that’s not on a main road – where a car is more likely to crash into you and kill you. why not pull over onto a mellow side street? your mom would prefer this too.

6. never ever go on a motorcycle ride date. no date is worth risking your life over!

7. braids and backpacks make you appear youthful… but so does not being old.

8. a long time ago my (now) ex boyfriend bought me a Chanel bag as a present. i never wore it because it was so fancy. i didn’t wanna mess it up. so i kept it in my closet in its box. i wanted to save it for something special. and then i realized: isn’t every day special? what if i die and never get a chance to wear it? what am i waiting for? so now i wear my special Chanel bag every day.

9. only text things worthy of screen grabbing and then posting on instgram.

10. yes, summer’s right around the corner, but don’t even THINK about going to the beach when you have your period! that’s when the sharks will eat you!

 

Patti Smith’s Advice For Young Artists

Tonight 9pm “Boycrazy Radio” w/ Ariel Pink! Call in! xx

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Tonight/Wednesday April 10, 2013 9pm pst join me during ‘Boycrazy Radio’

 

Call in and ask a question, so together we can discuss and solve all your love, sex, dating, & overall life problems: 

(646) 378-0649

 

Click HERE to listen to LIVE show.

 

If you’re in another country, you can call in using gmail or Skype!

 

If you can’t call in during the live show, leave a message in the boycrazy voice-mailbox: (888)666-2045

 

Follow me on twitter @imboycrazy  

 

Subscribe to ‘Boycrazy Radio’ on iTunes

 

Listen to previous episodes of ‘Boycrazy Radio’ below:

Listen to internet radio with Alexi Wasser on Blog Talk Radio

ALEXI RECOMMENDS: a mix by jimi hey…

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“I made this on a double cassette deck in my bedroom in either late 95/early 96. I suppose this was me trying to live out my fantasies of being a DJ in the vein of The Invisible Scratch Pickles or The X-ecutioners or whoever. Also I harbored secret fantasies of DJing at raves but there was no chance of that happening. I didn’t know how to scratch, nor could I afford a sampler. So instead I did this using only the pause button to make fake samples/loops. No samplers were used in the making of this tape. Source material taken from various LP’s, cassettes, and a few CD’s. Very low tech. Very mid 90’s.

It now serves as an unintentional time capsule and as a document of a tiny slice of my teens. Requires patience as it doesn’t really get cooking until around 7 or 8 minutes in. It’s mostly of interest to those I tagged because either their music is used in it or they may remember that brief moment in time in Los Angeles when some of us had one foot in the Jabberjaw/hardcore punk world and the other in the rave scene. Kind of a weird undocumented hybrid sort of thing.

It’s an at times distasteful world in which the likes of This Heat lives next door to Kraftwerk, Miami Bass, The Frogs, Kiss, The Magic Pacer, Land Of The Loops, various comedy albums, Pigmeat Markham, Kid N Play, Aphex Twin, Jungle Brothers, Brainiac, Eric B. & Rakim, MC Hammer, Tower Of Power, God Is My Co-Pilot, Korn, Mahavishnu Orchestra, Biz Markie, De La Soul, Run DMC, Fugazi, Warren G, Led Zep, Lee Perry, some Sebadoh side project whose name I forget, Chemical Brothers, Yellow Magic Orchestra, Martin Lawrence stand up, The Locust, Public Enemy, L.L. Cool J, Tortoise, The Crimson Curse, Soul Oddity, Megadeth, Rush, The Republic Of Freedom Fighters, Universal Order of Armageddon, Alec Empire, Silver Apples, Pearl Jam, Native Nod, Mantronix, Orbital, Beck, Boogie Down Productions, Clikatat Ikatowi, Sir Mix A Lot, The VSS, Trans Am, DJ Shadow, Komeda, Satisfact, DJ Mark The 45 King, Body Count, Aretha Franklin. Bollywood soundtracks, Los Cincos, Squarepusher, Anthrax, Dio, Luke Vibert, Audio Two, Atari Teenage Riot, Ice T, The Sea And Cake, Sleepytime Trio, Antioch Arrow, Ice Cube, etc.

In short, a really fucked array of sounds you’ll never hear sandwiched together anywhere else more than any sort of showcase of would be skillz.” – Jimi Hey

 

Tonight 9pm “Boycrazy Radio” – Call in! xx

 

Tonight/Wednesday April 3, 2013 9pm pst join me during ‘Boycrazy Radio’

 

Call in to ask a question, so together we can discuss and solve all your love, sex, dating, & overall life problems: 

(646) 378-0649

 

Click HERE to listen to LIVE show.

 

If you’re in another country, you can call in using gmail or Skype!

 

If you can’t call in during the live show, leave a message in the boycrazy voice-mailbox: (888)666-2045

 

Follow me on twitter @imboycrazy  

 

Subscribe to ‘Boycrazy Radio’ on iTunes

 

Listen to previous episodes of ‘Boycrazy Radio’ below:

Listen to internet radio with Alexi Wasser on Blog Talk Radio


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