the only GOOD thing about how expensive and far away ‘we care’ is- is that, for a person like me it means 1.) I MUST follow the rules, cuz I don’t take money for granted. And 2.) I NEED to be secluded in the desert in order to fast- cuz I don’t have willpower when it comes to food!
‘we care‘ is everything i forgot it was! i love it here. it’s like a grown up version of summer camp. women are euphoric here! why? because none of us are eating and that only means one thing: we’re losing weight! i’m the youngest person here. that won’t always be the case, so i’ll enjoy it while i can. you should too, whoever you are. after all, today is the youngest you’re ever gonna be!
If you wanna be a mean, elitist asshole, who makes everyone around them feel less than, insecure, excluded, etc, it’s easy peasy! here’s your sure fire ticket into a super cool hierarchy of the mean people/cooler kids club. People will whisper about you and wonder why you don’t like them.
so, there was a party for nylon magazine last night. it’s hard for me to get motivated to go out MOST of the time. i complain, try to talk myself out of it, get lazy, do surgery on my face so i’d be crazy to be seen in pubic. but not last night. last night i didn’t give a fuck. tights, eyeliner, and out the door. i had pants and a shirt on too. but that’s not the point. the point is, i had boycrazy stickers to hand out and beautiful boys to prey upon. and that’s what i did.
i ran into lots of beautiful people that i love seeing, and i even made some new friends. i danced to lady gaga. yeah. lady fucking gaga. i couldn’t stop eye darting (that’s when you’re SUPPOSED to be focusing on the person you’re talking to, but your eyes keep darting around the room cuz you can’t stop looking at what’s going on around you). i hate when people do that to me, and here i was doing it too. but the party was too fucking crowded! i had to!
a girls hair caught on fire, which i thought was epic. she ran off screaming after we put it out, totally ignoring me when i offered her a sticker. my mantra for the evening was ‘free stickers for beautiful people.’ where do i come up with this shit?
the ‘hills’ was being shot at the party. i MIGHT even be an extra on the episode. DREAMS DO COME TRUE! i tried not to be, but my friend brooke kept sitting at a banquet near the filming. what can you do? life is so hard! i was so confused! the hills was on tv during the party AND being filmed AT the party! wtf? it’s like that ‘if a tree falls in the forest‘ saying or whatever…. yowsers! good thing i have tivo. xo
so, the other day i was on the phone with my friend jesse. i had just walked out of the american apparel on ventura blvd and had A LOT of hot goss to spew. mid conversation, i walked past a parked fire truck. HMMMM, where there’s a fire truck, firemen are SURE to follow! there was no sign of a blazing inferno and a few steps further down the boulevard i hit FIREMAN MECCA! a table of fireman dudes having lunch! it was too good to be true. i didn’t know what to do. i got nervous. i wanted to approach them, but i was too shy. my heart started beating faster than normal even! thank god for jesse’s words of encouragement: ‘you have to do this dude. they’re firemen! if anyone knows what to do, it’s you.’ she was right. i hung up the phone. (even though it’s a blackberry and there was nothing to hang it on. that phrase just doesn’t make sense anymore.) and took a deep breath.
so, I’ve been getting A LOT of e-mails asking for advice on how to lose your virginity. e-mails from girls who are between the ages of 19 and 26 who are still virgins, asking me for advice. i didn’t really know how i could help or what i could say. so i gave it some thought and here’s what i came up with:
the other night I went on a date with a dude. we met up at real food daily; a vegan restaurant on la cienega. I still prefer m cafe-but whatevs! I’m not gonna slit my wrists or anything. I just LOVE it when straight dudes like to eat healthy! We finished our food, and I got in his car so we could drive to erewhon market to get dessert. we sat outside sharing raw vegan ice cream and a piece of cake (it was actually pie, but i think the word cake is so much cuter) and continued our hangout sesh. we liked eachother. i just know it.
meet yvan rodic AKA the face hunter. i did! and the entire experience was awesome! he’s a blogger too(except he has a way bigger following than me), he’s a boy, and he takes pictures of interesting faces that he finds all around the world. he also has an Internet TV show even!!!
he’s part Serbian, part Swiss and now lives in London. he speaks English, french, German, some Serbian and Swedish.