11. a lot of dudes are gay. A lot of dudes aren’t gay. your job is to figure out which are which. Good luck! Cuz I can’t tell anymore.
12. take a bath in epsom salt at least once a day. use it for your longest soak. it gets rid of any water you might be retaining.
13. drink at least 1.5 L of water daily. but be wary of the dream dashers who will try to bum out your new water incentive by telling you that too much water will flush out all your vitamins and kill you. these are lame, jealous, and unhappy people. just try to drink your water.
14. shave your legs everyday-even though I’m a big believer in the theory that the night you DON’T shave your legs is the night you end up meeting the boy of your dreams/or sexiest makeout ever!
15. get rid of all the negative people in your life. Toss ‘em. They’re energy drainers, and there’s no time for them.
16. try not to be one of these energy drainers. Otherwise, you might get tossed!
17. you can’t feel bad or hurt by someone-unless u let them hurt you. I’m talking about feelings and emotions and stuff. A punch in the face will totally hurt anyone! So take control of your feelings and don’t let anyone hurt them or have power over you. Haven’t you seen the last scene of labyrinth!? “you have no power over me!” Jesus!
18. even if u aren’t letting people hurt your feelings-be consciously aware of the assholes who try to. wish them well in your mind, and then get the fuck away from them. you don’t have to be a hater to cut the dead weight out of your life my little babies! Shit, that reminds me, I’ve gotta sort some shit out in my own life.
19. sex makes you happy: unless you were raped or molested and it brings back weird memories. in which case, that’s totally terrible and I’m sorry. you should talk to a therapist. feel free to write to me and I’ll suggest someone qualified to help you deal with that. you are loved.
20. movies/TV shows to watch if your pms’y or sad or just wanna feel girly and super awesome:
dazed and confused
when harry met sally
pretty in pink
last days of disco
my wife is an actress
my so called life
Madonna documentary- I’m going to tell you a secret
unzipped-isaac mizrahi documentary
truth or dare
beverly hills 90210-old school version
tim guns guide to style
freaks and geeks
(light easy breezy viewing that will make you feel like a citizen of cozytown usa!) xo