thank you to THE FADER!

when the fader first approached me to do an interview about my relationship with the Internet, i thought it was a practical joke. for some reason, i thought it was a murderer who had devised a pretty convincing plan to kill me… using my ego/never ending desire to talk about myself as the perfect ploy to getting my address, and an invitation to enter my home. and yet, i still said yes. ‘sure, send him over!’

luckily, it was all legit! phew. but the second hurdle was after i opened my front door to let the videographer into my place. the boy operating the camera was a super tall twenty something babe!

this only added to my nerves and self consciousness! OH GREAT! now i had to worry about attracting this dude! fuck! in my minds eye, i expected a George Costanza type to be behind the camera. no offense to the character of George┬áCostanza, but his aesthetic would have put me more at ease! that’s all. instead, the babes presence in my home, holding a camera pointed at my face turned me into a crazy FUCKING nervous wreck! i was uuber frazzled in a major way!.

i started to calm down mid way through…. but i acted like a complete nut case: before, after, and in between takes. more so than usual, even! i couldn’t stop rambling. saying the same phrases over and over again, like; ‘I’m freaking out. i can’t do this. i think I’m having a panic attack. don’t look at me. look at me! ahhhhhh.’ i even popped a beta blocker to stop from shaking. (don’t try this at home kids, unless you’re a violinist, who’s about to go on stage for a performance, and you need to keep your hands from shaking!)

luckily we both got through it, and the video above is the final product of two people crossing paths for an hour, one hectic day. enjoy. xo, acw