Things that keep me from wanting to die:

1. Flirting.

2. Eye fucking. It’s the safest sex ever, and sometimes even more intimate.

3. Holding eye contact with strangers in general. Feeling awkward is still a feeling, and it’s just nice to feel. Plus, you can think of it like a game: whoever looks away first loses.

4. Unprotected sex & not getting pregnant herpes aids.

5. Wandering in whole foods. Any whole foods.

6. Wandering in Target. Any Target.

7. Clear Band-Aids for black people on white people.

8. The sound of kids laughing… and knowing they aren’t my responsibility.

9. Sushi that doesn’t give you food poisoning.

10. Falling in love.

11. Horses: Looking at them and/or Riding them. NOT eating or fucking them.

12. My friends!

13. Loveline.

14. Men who are just as romantic as me.

15. Woody allen: Annie hall, Manhattan, Hannah and her sisters, etc.

16. Wonderland Avenue elementary school in Laurel Canyon.

17. Making out for hours and hours and talking about anything and everything with someone you can’t get enough of.

18. Roald dahl.

19. Judy blume: ‘just as long as we’re together’ is one my favorite books in the whole world!!!

20. Sex & the city!

21. Bike rides.

22. Malibu.

23. The belief that one day I will actually go to Hawaii, the Island of Mustique and Bora-Bora.

24. Hikes in Fryman canyon.

25. The books ‘thin skin’ & ‘name dropper’ by Emma Forrest.

26. ‘Sweet valley high’ books

27. Felicity. 

28. My so called life.

29. Beverly hills 90210 (the ORIGINAL series)

30. Goodform hair salon on Fairfax in LA! Jay diola (the owner) is straight with abs you could wash your clothes on; and if you ask nicely… he might even let you touch them!

31. Trails Cafe in Griffith park! I’ve never actually eaten there, but I’ve passed by and it looks adorable! I cant wait to go!

32. Naturewell on sunset: get a kale and coconut smoothie & a face melter! you’d be crazy not to/u WONT regret it! Actually, who knows? maybe you will.

33. My mom! She’s had way more sex and abortions than i’ve had (i’ve yet to have my first abortion)… And for that, i love her and have things to aspire to! How do you think i got this way? Actually, it’s more to do with my dad! And NO, i was NOT molested! how dare you! but what was wrong with ME?

34. The canyon country store! I even used to work there when i was in high school!

35. New York.

36. Central park.

37. Christmas trees.

38. Hot chocolate.

39. The movie ‘When harry met sally’

40. The movie ‘Broken english’

41. The movie ‘The anniversary party’

42. The movie ‘Dazed and confused’

43. Sex in cars.

44. Sex in really plush cozy beds.

45. Sex in hotel rooms.

46. The smell of a fireplace burning.

47. How the word ‘cozy’ makes me feel.

48. An hour-long, full body massage.

49. Manicures & pedicures at nail salons where the Asian ladies don’t talk shit about you behind your back, and won’t infect your toes and fingers.

50. Men who pay for dinner, even if they’re just you’re friend.

51. Heated pools.

52. Gregory at andy lecompte salon! He’s funny, flaming gay, gorgeous, looks like a hesher/90’s icon, and is a master at what he does… Hair and talking shit!

53. Halloween: hay rides, trick-or-treating in costumes, universal studios Halloween horror nights, pumpkin patches, and the change in weather and the leaves turning different colors.

54. The arclite. It’s the best theatre in Los Angeles.

55. Seeing movies alone.

56. Seeing a movie with someone i REALLY like.

57. That feeling when you first like someone and you haven’t kissed yet, and just holding hands makes you feel elated/light headed/ecstatic.

58. Fast times at ridgemont high

59. Frozen yogurt: anything vanilla-y & peanut buttery with butterfinger and Oreo toppings.

60. Bubble baths.

61. Epsom salt baths.

62. Baths in general.

63. Coffee!!! Huge white mugs of coffee with half n half! (variations on this include lattes and cappuccinos… But mainly NONFAT lattes)

64. Knowing that you’re good at something and that fact being reinforced by people you respect telling you they like what you do/respect you.

65. Being paid/making money doing something you love.

66. Really good bad tv. (personally, i’m talking about all the real housewife and kardashian shows).

67. Cafe gratitude: even though the names of some/all of the food is kind of ridiculous, and the fact that they make you say the names of the ridiculously named items on the menu out loud and ask you a question of the day is bogus – it’s still great, the food is epic & healthy, and the people who work there are nice!

68. Larchmont beauty center.

69. Malls! The Beverly center/the grove/malls in general.

70. Pace. Super cozy restaurant tucked away in Laurel Canyon with the best food ever. Never disappoints me.

71. Wasteland on Melrose! Ask for Ernest! He’s the best!

72. The Olympic spa! It’s just for girls cuz everyone walks around all naked and steams/soaks/scrubs it out! Whatever ‘it’ may be.

73. Universal Studios Tram Ride. Even though I was born and raised in Hollywood, that tram ride reminds me of why people come from all around the world, with big dreams, to live here.

74. My wonderful therapist who looks like santa claus: i enjoy our weekly, hour long conversations. he makes me calm. he gives me a sense of stability/routine. he puts things in perspective and has taught me how to be kind to myself/make adult decisions/and not be so frantic.

75. Being experienced enough to know that even if everything isn’t great NOW, time makes everything better and to remain hopeful.

• If i forgot to mention anything worth living for, please add your OWN thoughts and feelings in the comment section.

• Follow me on twitter @imboycrazy